First I watched Marcus Brigstocke chat to a Tory MP on 'I've never seen Star Wars'. I usually like Marcus Brigstocke, he's kind of like a cuddly Louis Theroux, a poor girls Louis if you will - except of course, he's not. Like anyone in the media he is public schooled, and there was something galling about watching him all pally with David Davis, like - however left wing he might be, Marcus has more in common with David Davis than he does with me.
Then I decided to see what else was on iplayer. I decided against 'Kirsten's topless ambition' the first few minutes of which was like watching my soul die. I am young enough to remember Kirsten as one of the presenters of my childhood, filling the space before The Simpsons with something less annoying than whatever was on CITV. I don't want to see her 'investigate' boosting her career by going topless. I don't want her to make light of sexism from her comfortable position as a middling tv person, and I don't want her to even think about getting her boobs out.
Instead I watched snog marry avoid. I'm not sure why, maybe I hate myself today. I'm not sure how this sort of stuff gets on television. The point of it all is to make girls look less 'fake'. I know I'm pointing out the obvious here, I know all this stuff is crap but still, I mean it's there isn't it - it exists. Someone gets paid to smear this excrement into people's consciousness. Probably more than two people.
I watched it most of the way through. It can't be bothered to rant about it because it's just too obvious why it is so bad.
I never particularly wanted to be the sort of person that 'doesn't have TV' but you, television - you drove me to it.