Thursday, February 26, 2009

Easily the most noble use of the internet

Yes I am up at 1am looking at bee dogs. Why aren't you?

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Have you seen the bearded lady?

In order to raise money and awareness about Reclaim the night I will be wearing a fake beard for a week between the 23rd and 28th of February.

You can sponsor me to do this, and read about my adventures in arkwardness at :

If you are in Edinburgh then you can also come along to the Bowery on the 18th and sponsor me in person.

All money goes to reclaim the night and women's charities in Edinburgh.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

If you type this into your browser it automatically redirects to A predictabley mysoginistic wank fest for insecure whiney scuzzbuckets. I mean really mysoginistic, like ' why the fuck did that moron get a book deal and I can't believe amazon are selling it' kind of mysoginy. Probably conceived by the satanic hate child of Richard Littlejohn, Melanie Phillips and Jeremy Clarkson.

At first the re-direction irritated me, but then I realised that the existence of this vomitous website (with no female equivalent) does offer convincing evidence that women are indeed better.

Not conclusive, but convincing.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Comedy Speed Dating

So I was flicking through the listings for the Glasgow Comedy Festival and came across this event 'comedy speed dating'. That's funny, but not ha ha funny.

The idea of spending an evening watching a bunch of medicore tits on a stage, and then having to sit there listening to dozens more trying to crack a funny within a specific time frame is enough to make me want to end my days single. Tommorrow.

Their wording is, of course, totally sexist 'We all know that the best way to a woman's heart is to make her laugh'. Yup, obviously the only people actively seeking dates are hetero men (or lesbian women but I DOUBT, to a CAPS LOCK extent that the writer had lesbians in his mind when he wrote that. At least, not in a non-sexist way)

Women, you better just sit there and smile while the hilarious men do the 'hard work' and make you laugh. Maybe that's why it costs £19.95 for women and a mere £9.95 for men.

The assumption that men are the funny ones is of course, intensley aggravating. The only justification they can have for men paying less is that fewer men speed date. Why is that? Could it be that it's much easier to get a date, as a man, than the media or popular culture suggest?

Why they think that women are prepared to pay a tenner more, in an attempt to bag a 'funny' man is beyond me...

Yup - this could be you...

Monday, February 2, 2009

Benefit frauds are women with health issues

So I spend a bit of time in Edinburgh's working class outskirts where I keep seeing the following advert in bus shelters.

There is a website about the campaign, with the following information.

'We're closing In' is aimed at people who have just begun or are thinking about committing benefit fraud. The campaign uses the very real risk of being caught as a deterrent. Its strong visuals highlight the investigation techniques used to track down benefit cheats, bringing home the message that there is no escape for those who commit fraud. '

So, what are these investigation techniques? Going around poorer areas and seeking out shifty looking overweight women, clutching their purses? And what the hell do they mean by 'strong visuals'? A fat woman? It is indeed true that women of her size are more likely to be on buses than bus shelters. Obviously if she can afford that many pies she must be cheating the decent healthy tax payer right? Forget the fact that obesity is often a symptom of poverty. Forget the fact that the people who do cost the tax payer millions are more likely to have penises, wear suits and hire accountants to do their dirty buisness.

It does however, give me an idea for a youth work project around political participation through the selective trashing of bus shelters. It would probably be quite popular, though I'm not sure where I would get funding...